The Two-Minute Management Course

Lesson One:

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be very, very high up..

Lesson Two:

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Nibble on some of my droppings." replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree, where he was immediately spotted by a farmer who shot him out of the tree.

Management Lesson: Bull #### might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson Three:

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was very cold and the bird froze and fell to the ground. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out!

He lay there warm and happy, and soon began to sing. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson:

1. Not everyone who sh#ts on you is your enemy.

2. Not everyone who gets you out of #### is your friend.

3. And when you're in deep sh#t, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

And that is your lesson for today folks..

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